Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Wrong Reactions ...

Did you ever have the wrong reaction to a situation but kept your true feelings under wraps because to say anything to the contrary would have been controversial and maybe lead to others reprimanding you or even shunning you?
I have these reactions all the time.
My most recent inappropriate reaction came today when I learned that I wouldn't be getting a job that I had been interviewed for.
I felt relieved.
I know - I am suppose to be sad and bewildered that they didn't want me in their office but frankly, I realized when I left the interview that it really wasn't the best situation for me. It will be a great job for someone else though and I wish whoever got it the best of luck. Meanwhile though, I will be pretend to be sad.
When my mother died a few weeks ago, a relative asked me what charity did we want donations to go to since sending flowers was such a waste since flowers only died and contributing to a charity was the right thing to do.
Well, my mother loved flowers. Simply adored them. And so do I. I don't consider them to be a waste and indeed, the fact they die is pretty symbolic of the whole living/dying process. As far as charities go, I actually find it kind of repulsive that they're gaining donations because of the collective guilt and misery of others. Since when did it become required for people to donate to a charity because someone died? Personally, I'd rather the flowers but not to offend that person, I told them they could donate to whatever charity they wanted but not to feel obligated in any way. Give what you want and when - but don't feel you have to do it because of this.
It's also trendy now to give donations in a person's name instead of a gift because the giver has decided that person has everything and doesn't need anything. I had this done to me once at an office Christmas party. I don't remember the charity but I do remember feeling pretty miserable because of this and the fact that I was the only one in the room not to receive anything. It was at a low point in my life when things weren't good and a gift would have gone a long ways to cheer me up. It probably sounds pretty selfish to some of you but that incident made me vow never to impose my personal standards on another person. If I ever get to a point where I don't want to give things to others, I'll make sure to take my name out of the gift exchange!

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